silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- did i say last entry until finals are done? my bad i also told myself that i wouldn't have a drink until finals were done. but it tastes so good going down... just one beer, not going to go crazy. i spent most of my day in the library, studying/being completely bored out of my mind. actually, JN texted me at some point and wanted to go have lunch, so he picked me up and we went to a soul food restaurant a bit away. he pretty much had me for about 2 hours, and it took a while of convincing him that i seriously had to go study for him to take me back. he's an interesting guy. i've never had any problems with him. people always say that he's mean and that he's a dick, but i think his character is fun. he tries to be an ass, but it doesn't work on me. especially when he's always inviting me out and paying for me, it's hard to dislike someone. he asked me when was the last time i had a boyfriend, and i told him it was just over a year ago. i find that to be an interesting question to ask, after all this time hanging out with me. he didn't really say why he asked me that though. i know that he's also interested in me. he was asking a bunch of questions about dating, etc. he used to be engaged, up until maybe this time last year. i didn't ask him about that because i don't know if the breakup was his doing or hers, and it's really not my business. but i did ask how long they were dating before the engagement, and he said 10 years. wtf. that's a long ass time. i don't plan on 'dating' anyone for 10 years. if i'm in it for a long time, then dammit, we might as well just get married. but it depends. because i was with D for almost 5 years and i know damn well that i didn't want to marry him. but then again, i also didn't love him anymore and didn't feel like we were working out, so that's a big part of it. i guess you just have to be wise about it all. but i'm not in the place for a serious relationship. i can only play around right now and figure things out. this beer tastes weird. it's fresh but it has a weird flatness to it. i noticed that with the others i have had from this pack, that sort of blows... i digress. anyways, JN is going on the boat cruise as well, so here goes for more drama. he told me how people would be confused when i am all over him, taking advantage of him, because they think he's still engaged. i like the way he puts that, like i'd seriously drop everything and jump all over him, in front of everyone. i'm not really attracted to him. i do appreciate his character though, we have fun together and i can sort of talk to him. not as well as i can talk to M or every now and then with R (when we are not having problems), but i at least have some decent friend connection with him. i can't imagine myself being all over him. i already know how thursday is going to go. as i've said a few entries prior, if not the last one (i have such a short term memory), i will 1) overdrink, 2) try to avoid R and prevent any disarray, but 3) will fail miserably and possibly get into an argument/get emotional with him, 4) i will be a mess, 5) i will flirt with JG because he pretty much asks for it, 6) i will flirt with whoever else, including D2, 7) i will have fun with my roommate and other friends. i think that sums it up. there really isn't room in there for me to take advantage of JN like he so desires, so i guess he'll just have to deal with it. if it comes down to it, yeah, i guess i could hook up with him. but i really don't see it happening. not really my type. even though i don't have a type. anyways... back to "studying". 9:15 p.m. - 2009-06-09 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||
|
||||||