silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- day after i guess i was a little irritated yesterday. my bad. it's none of my business what R does. i just need to stop caring, about that and about so many other things. i just keep slipping. i try so hard to not care. and i do good for a while. and then i don't know, alcohol gets in my system, thoughts get into my head, a whirlwind of craziness takes place, and there i am, a bitter, crazy, emotional woman. i'm good though. i just have to focus on what is most important to me right now. family, real friends, and school. i'm doing okay with school right now. i got another crown submitted to lab, so i'm happy about that. it's getting me on my way. one step closer to graduation. i just want to be successful. i just want to do something right. i think i'm accomplishing that, somewhat. also, JS keeps texting me. i don't understand him, we just started talking again maybe 2 weeks ago, after maybe 7 years of nothing; we always come back together. maybe he's bored, maybe he thinks that the things that he says are the things that i want to hear. i'm actually indifferent about it all. i'm good to flirt right back at him. i don't anticipate anything coming of him. he claims that he wants to see me soon, before my december break, which is interesting. what's the urgency? if it's even true. his words don't really affect me in any way. i'm watching tool academy 2. M was watching it last night with his gf and chatting with me, and he asked me if he, too, is a tool because of his relationship with me i presume. hahaha. i should sleep now.. well, finish watching the show first obviously. and by the way, M wasn't too happy to hear about JS texting me. the way he looks at me is seemingly... not possessive... not hurt..., but the look like 'why are you talking to me about another man?' i was actually trying to get a read off of him, because he really does want to be the only man i crave. he tries to play it off, but he's still iffy about R and anyone else.. anyways again... 12:27 a.m. - 2009-09-01 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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