silver4's Diaryland Diary

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Don't know..

I am fairly convinced that everything is a joke. A lie. I'm so tired of it all. I'm tired of school, I'm tired of obligations, I'm tired of expectations, I'm tired of men, always tired of men. I'm tired of giving in and having complete disregard for myself and my feelings. I want to give a shit but I don't have the energy. And lately as I hang around M, I think that I really am not into him. He's a great friend and my best friend, but any of this accessory stuff doesn't have to happen. It's because of his desires. And my indifference. I don't care. But sometimes I think that I'm glad it's an unattainable situation, because I wouldn't want to be part of it. And what's the point for him? What's the point of getting with me and all these fantasies he tells me about... We do it all just fine...

I fell asleep writing that. Not complete thoughts there. Goodnight..

10:14 p.m. - 2009-10-27

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