silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Good morning It is cold. I awaken to the sound of what seems to be someone incessantly trying to drill some huge ass diameter holes in the wall. And it sounds like rain, which I was told rain was in order for ten days straight. Okay, the drilling has stopped. Now it's just cold and rainy. And I'm sleepy. I spent most of yesterday with M. We went to lunch outside the city, went on some trail to see views of the city and a lighthouse. Then he had to do some recording thing with guys from school, so I went shopping for my birthday dress, and then afterwards he came back to just kick it and try to sneak kisses when he could, but my roommates were around. His girl was out of town for a bit but then decided to come back in late last night, so some of our plans changed. And I believe one of my roommates is questioning my friendship with M, if not both of them. But nobody says anything to me so far so it's all good I suppose. For now. I'm getting tired of this thing with M only in the sense that he wants too much time with me, he wants to see me too much beyond school, he always wants to touch me. And one of my issues in life is that I don't like people touching me unnecessarily. Hugs are okay when it is understood that we are to hug. But touching my arms, elbows, waist, anything really, I just don't like. However, since we are sleeping together, he gets some leeway. And R is allowed to touch me, but he is never inappropriate or unexpected. I even hate when people put up their hands for a high five. I don't want to be touched, but it's sort of rude to deny some motions. Now M, I don't know. I mean, shit. He's not my boyfriend, yet he wants the powers of one, the benefits and the priority. It gets annoying after a while. I've mentioned this before, it's nothing new. I guess i'm just tired of sneaking around and I want to either have someone of my own or nobody at all. I shall clean my room now I suppose. 9:19 a.m. - 2010-01-18 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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