silver4's Diaryland Diary

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ready to go

i can't wait to leave this damn place. i hate being here now. i love my friends but i'm tired of it all. i just want to get the fuck away from here. i can hear people in the hallway playing beer pong. or maybe they're playing poker, i don't know. i'm tired of it. i wish they were gone, i want all of this to be over with and gone gone gone. it has run its course. i just hope and pray that i can leave this place for good and not have to come back for any requirements. i feel like such a waste right now, such a waste. i hate stuff about boards, wrebs, job hunting. i hate men. i hate what my relationships with specific men have been like. i hate the stress of friendships and people. and patients. i'll never lose the stress of patients, but at least sitting around depending on people to show up in order for me to graduate will no longer be an issue. i just want to fuckin get out of here.

i'm getting myself worked up right now. i think i need a beer to calm the nerves.

this life with these idiots, it just doesn't cut it for me. i prefer to be alone. i want to never think about R again. i want to leave all of my emotions for him in sf. well hell, i have no choice actually. i don't know though, obviously vegas is a visit spot, and i think that the crew will try to meet up there at some point. i still want to keep in touch with people.

i went to get food earlier today and stopped by my patient's ice cream shop. he made me a huge banana split with all the decorations; this was my first meal of the day, at like 1 p.m. i gave him my contact information with my real phone number and my email address. and then he told me that if i ever need anything, like $10000, to feel free to ask him for it. i laughed at him, but he said he was serious. so i was like wow, that's so sweet. but i wouldn't take advantage of that.

blahhhhh i just want to pack up and leave already. please?

9:38 p.m. - 2010-05-31

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