silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Oooover it Sorry about yesterday; I have my moments. The song "what about your friends?" by tlc played in my head a lot today. La la la "or will they turn their backs on you?" good stuff. People were being dicks basically and I realize that the friend I am to others is not at all like the friend that they are to me, because I actually go out of my way to protect my friends and don't let people talk shit about them in front of me, I defend everything about them and would get up and save the day at 3 or 4 in the morning out of my slumber if one would ask me to come pick them up. Friends mean a lot to me, that's why I pick who I pick, and that's why I do what I can to maintain the friendships that mean the most to me. But then I learn that the behavior is not reciprocated and that people have done one thing and claimed the opposite in front of me... It hurts in spite of my claims to have no feelings. I would never treat people I care about with such disrespect. But that's what makes us different people I suppose. On a lighter note, there's this dr at the school who makes it a habit to hit on me and say inappropriate things under the guise of friendly light chit chat. As he talks to me, he basically spends the time staring at my chest and I see him checking me out all the time. This guy is maybe 30+ years older than me, married (of course), his wife works at the school too and she loves me as well. And when the two are together, his behavior towards me is very passive. But in general, she's on the other end of clinic, and so when he's working with my group, I can feel his eyes staring at me. Sometimes I play and wear something that is completely covering and unflattering, like a turtleneck sweater, but it makes no difference, he still says off comments and alludes to me going up to his office and how he'd give me a back massage (mm hmm...) and how he wouldn't let other people up there besides me, and how when he was on vacation a few months back that he planned on relaxing on the beach (with his wife) and he intended to visualize me frolicking around in my tropical dresses that I bought in Fiji. Yes. Oddly inappropriate. However, I let him be semi-creepy old man to me, because if that encourages him to give me good scores in clinic, so be it. It's not just me, I see how he talks to the cutesy pretty girls, he loves the ladies. I don't consider myself a cutesy pretty girl, I like to see myself as a hard core bad ass. But yeah. So I saw him today and he's like "blah blah i should give you the contact info for this dentist I know in Vegas, I have the number in my office. What are you doing tomorrow afternoon? You should come up to my office." and I think "hm creepy dr, you already know that you'll see me in the morning because you work with my group, why don't you just bring the contact info down with you in the morning and save yourself the trouble of having to explain why you're trying to get me in your office". But I didn't say that. I thought it. Common sense says that he thought it too. He also says "the answer is yes" to me every now and then. I ask him well what is the question though? And he just says "the answer is yes". And today he said "so when is it going to happen?" and I asked him what are you referring to? And he said "you know what I mean" jokingly, and I said "well whatever it is, I know the answer is yes". The whole time with him staring at my body. I act like I don't notice, but I also play into it. I am an admitted flirt. Everyone knows it and they call me out on it. I can't help it, I love men. Except for the creepy ones. So anyways, yeah. I may be semi imagining things, but I know I'm not. And I know I shouldn't play into his game, but it's fun. It's my entertainment, especially in front of M, because M thinks it's ridiculous how this dr is with the cutesy girls, so I will walk by creepy dr and M will tell me later how he checked out my ass. Hahaha. Okay blaaaah back to studying. T minus 12 days and I'm on my way away from fake friends and back to Vegas. 11:13 p.m. - 2010-06-03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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