silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- losing it i'm going absolutely fuckin crazy. all this bs for licensure, and waiting, and waiting, and waiting. and now it looks like i won't be able to do a damn thing for another month, because the board hasn't gotten back to me, and i check the mail every day with wishful thinking, but i have absolutely nothing from them, although they claimed i would receive something from them within 1-2 weeks or so, which is looking now like 2-3 weeks?? i don't know. i don't know. so i emailed the chick who took forever to respond to me in the first place, but if she's the 'licensing specialist' as is stated in her email, then she should check her fuckin email and look into this shit. i should've basically just submitted an app for licensure in CA and worked there while all of this processing for NV takes forever. it is killing me. i have NOTHING to do, and i will now have absolutely nothing to do for another month. money? barely there. i am scrounging. i am bored out of my mind. i am trying to hold on to every penny i have now. i can't spend, i can't splurge. i can't go shopping to pass the time. i am sitting on my ass, watching tv, sitting on the computer, chatting, texting, waiting for someone to talk to. i can go to the gym; that's already paid for. this is terrible, this is what i hate. i hate sitting around doing nothing. i don't understand how my mom and my sisters were able to sit around doing this all the time. i have to be productive. put me in school, put me somewhere. and then all i want to do is drink, have some beer. but nope, i drank them all. none left here. and if i want more? money. a;lskdfjal;sdfj ugh. and i'm hungry too. fuck. i should find some food. my mom called and claimed she wants to go to lunch or something. well i hope she wants to pay for it then. and for my alcohol. because i can't handle this. i'm going crazy. plus there's nothing entertaining to eat right now. i want something like chocolate or doritos or twinkies. those are entertaining to eat. okay yeah, fattening. but do i care? that's why i got a gym membership. i'm in a crisis dammit! okay, maybe not really, but still. it's not even august, and i have to now basically wait until september. fuckin september. what the hell. this month was already long enough. i'm losing my mind. i need to get away from here. i need to do something. and it's not like i can just jump and grab some other part time job, what can i do? i'm pretty sure i'm overeducated for basic bs places. and hell no am i going to work for a bitch paycheck. nope. there has to be a snack around h here somewhere. i have edamame. yay. fuck this, i should go to walgreens and just go wild, grab all the unhealthy snack food i want. i say this as i stare at my belly. ugh. ;alsdkfkj fine. edamame it is. i wish i had chocolate syrup to drizzle over it :( 11:49 a.m. - 2010-07-28 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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