silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Obsession? There's this guy, I might have mentioned him before, I'm sure I have but not certain of the extent of detail, DW... CH's bro in law is hell-bent on getting me together with this guy. Mind you, I probably met the bro once or twice, the first time being over 7 years ago, and the second I believe was last summer. At a bday party for CH I believe, early afternoon, at which I was naturally drinking (bday party I say..). Anyways, point is, minimal interaction, nothing memorable, I paid most of my attention to my friends, and CH's mom, we chatted a lot. I like talking with the parents... I digress. Anyways, he works with some guy and maybe a month ago, maybe longer, was sending texts to CH asking about me, am I single, blah blah, knows this guy, blah blah, carries on. Now me, I want to meet new people, no doubt. However, it has now gotten to the point where the annoying factor has kicked in. He sent me a pic of the dude and basically a bio. Age, has kids, is nice, blah blah. Okay. Well I wasn't asking all that, but okay. And he looks nice and all, but I know me. I know that I don't want a relationship. And all this damn pushiness, especially of late, is a turn off. "Hey is she interested in my boy? Blah blah what's up blah blah blah??" CH said he is bugging her like every other day about me. Now common sense would say, if a girl is not being very responsive and actively pursuing communication with the guy, that maaaaybe, just maybe, he's not the first thing on her mind? I don't know what kind of person this dude played me up to be, but it's very overhyped at this point. Like now I don't really care to try to meet up, because he's being too pushy. Not that I was eager and picking out outfits for my first date with him in anticipation for it although unset... I don't understand people. I asked CH, does he not get that I'm broke, carless (waiting for it, maybe one more month!!), jobless, live with my dad (for now...you know), and pretty average? There's nothing amazingly magnificent about me that he should be pining over. I'm just a girl. But a single girl, maybe that's it. A knowingly single girl, head on straight, somewhat ambitious, educated (although my grades don't rock), with a decent career...that hasn't started yet...but still. Is he trying to swoop because I'll have money? I sort of have to be cautious now with the people I bring into my life. Additionally, he doesn't know where I stand. I am still sadly emotional about R occasionally, although I think I am winning that mental fight finally. But I'm not going to throw my attention towards somebody just because they want me to. Relationships and friendships don't happen like that for me. So CH asked me if I wanted the guy's number to call him and shut them up, or if I wanted her to give him my number. Um...oh hell no on that. So what, so he can bug me at his disposal and give me reasons to ignore him and avoid his calls? No sir, give me his number and I'll contact if I feel like it. And frankly, I'm not convinced that I'll feel like it. It would have to be at like at a group event, I'm not a classic dater. I never date. I wouldn't know what to do. I don't have etiquette and I wouldn't be modest. If I want a long island, I will not order a water dammit. Sleeping pills are kicking in. Point is, don't try to hook me up with anybody. There will be disappointment all around because I am not a date person. I've said it before, my focus is on my career. And WTF is up with the kids? Do you really want to bring some random girl around the kids? Kids are affected by the presence of new people coming in and out of their lives. And I'm still in party mode, as long as I can get away with it. I cannot possibly be a good woman to him when I want to be out dancing and drinking all night. And I still have feelings for R, although controlled... Or so I think. I talked to him online today. No unnecessary emotions fortunately.. Okay yeah eyelids are giving up on me. I was just complaining because I can. Good night. I actually have a bunch of things I want to do in the morning. Blah. 1:00 a.m. - 2010-08-27 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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