silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Woes Work is so stupid sometimes. I don't understand how the front office can be so hard headed... but it's the weekend and I don't want to work myself up over it, I don't deserve the stress of them right now. Breathe. I think two of my sisters are avoiding me now because I asked them for the money they owe me. Money that was lent out several months ago, maybe up to a year ago for one sister. And there's really little regard to paying me back. For one sis, the situation blows for her because of the decisions that she has made over the years and the domino effect of downfall from all the lack of reputable jobs she has had. Although having held several, and I mean SEVERAL, jobs, very few are places or names with any substance. It's a bunch of "oh I work for this guy I do this thing sometimes", things that no one can repeat back because no one knows what the hell she's talking about. My mom pulls a lot of that too. So honestly when people ask me what my mom or sister do for work, I say I don't know. Because, to this moment, I really don't know. And it's been that way for years. But thats me. And the other sister is a stripper and has feign desire to start a business, which I'm sure she could, but I think she's allergic to school or to putting forth the solid effort to improve her life situation. She's had this "job" for maybe 10 years now, and my dad is told that she does cocktails. Honestly, if you have to lie to your parents for a decade about your job, maybe there is a reason why? Shame? I don't know. She seems fine to be doing it, but she won't tell our dad and if you cant be proud of or admit what you do then don't do it. Again, just my thoughts. But she owes me more money, like $1000, which in stripper world is one night of work sometimes, but she gets caught up paying for her man's bs and their bills and their friend is living with them for like $200 a month and oh he hasn't paid that $200 yet and blah blah and she's not in the mood to work tonight blah blah... Okay. No. I get in the wrong mood and don't want to work sometimes, but what am I going to do? Call in and say hey sorry no dr today? It must be nice to have the lifestyle to choose when you work and when you just want to take a week off because.. Well just because. I work my ass off to exhaustion just to get a damn weekend off. And then I put my money away where I can't see it to try to be responsible so I can pay my imminent taxes and student loans, and then I loan money to their sob stories. I know, they both have shitty resumes when it comes down to it. How can you recall your work history when it's "this guy" or "some place"? Just thinking out loud. No, I don't think I'm better than anyone. No, I'm not on a high horse. One sis has a kid, the other has a long term boyfriend, they both live in houses whereas I live in a one bedroom apartment with a turtle that's been asleep for almost four weeks now. Yeah they don't own the houses, but they have a lot more liberty than I have in that sense. I bounce from office to office, at least two locations a week, one over 60 miles away (around 140 miles total on thursdays), to try to make ends meet, but at least I try. And I've never asked any of them for any support or money, even when I was a poor(er) dental student. The economy blows for everyone. I still buy ramen noodles and I'm happy when they are on sale for $0.10. I like when my turtle sleeps a lot because, although I'm bored and can't play with her, I get to save on the $1.50 bag of carrots that she likes. And she is fussy, she will reject food unless it's the particular thing she likes. So my point is that money sucks right now and I aim to be ahead when my tax stuff rolls around. I'm going to owe thousands upon thousands of dollars because it doesn't get taken out of my checks, and I don't want to be incapable of paying due to poor money management. That means I would like the $1000+ owed back so I can get myself on track. And so my sisters avoid me until they have some money they can give me? Whatever. I'm not being a bitch about it, I just asked if it's possible now to get some of it back. Blah. I need to exercise. I'm in a mood. And if I had to work today, I would have shown up with a fake smile anyways, because that's what people who want to afford to buy carrots for their pet do. 6:56 a.m. - 2011-10-22 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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