silver4's Diaryland Diary

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Greed

JA wanted to hang out. I (fortunately) had work till about 6:30, then by luck, a friend needed a plus one for a free dinner at a new restaurant's soft opening on the strip. I think that if I did not have that come up, I would have been weak and succumbed to him.

Dammit he's still texting me. Ignoring. Ugh. He is a cute guy though. Too bad he is deceitful. Too bad that isn't reason enough to not consider him.

I haven't spoken to MG in almost a week. Maybe a tiny text here and there, but with no follow up. About half an hour ago, he sends me a snapchat, and I find myself melting into the thought of him again. I do great when he disappears for a while. I may pine for a couple days, but then I snap out of it. I talk to others, flirt with others, everything. Then he gives me a whisper of attention and I sit back in hopes that he will reply again soon. A picture of him, he wrote that he was tired, and he drew a heart.

I wish I could love him.

Sleeping pill time. Moments of emotional weakness warrant medication.

11:22 p.m. - 2014-09-24

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