silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Find a way Missed another concert tonight. I'm almost well. Maybe... I think. I am distracting my heart by redirecting my emotions. Not that I need the attention, but my friend JM is in town and checked in on me when he heard I wasn't coming to the show. JH also checked on me again, which is adorable of him. CA is also among those guys tonight; he did not check on me, which is not surprising. It would have been shocking if he actually did contact me. Still don't know why I hook up with him. Ohh yes...mutual convenience. Anything to take my thoughts away from MG. God I miss him. I hate to admit it. But I miss him. The vast majority of my thoughts have nothing to do with him. And then my mind goes blank, and I wander... If I could start again, a million miles away... I might be catching a simple break for this office. I won't mention it yet, I don't want to jinx myself. It's nothing big, it's actually silly to hope for, but it is something that frustrates me quite regularly. See, if I can think about anything else, I am fine. One of these days he is just going to show up though, and that will melt me again. No backbone. I bought a couple books this evening. Dental. Cost $250 on amazon. Honestly though, this is what I do when I get a little extra change? All in the name of self-improvement, right? Distractions...going to bed 10:08 p.m. - 2014-10-06 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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