silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 0 sum MG dropped off an anniversary present to the office yesterday, an orchid plant, beautiful. He also paid for our lunch when we went to a sushi restaurant, and later came to talk to me about office stuff. I hate that I have feelings for him. I hate days when I text him and I get no response. I get that he is busy. I get that he has a real life, obviously. But I can't help that I have these emotions. He has the right words, he knows the right words to fuck me up completely. I hate when I am weak. It is pathetic. It is all simply pathetic. What am I supposed to do? I just want something to be mine. I have my good days and bad days, I do. I just need to hook up with someone else again. Sadly, I think that helps me clear my mind, helps me reset myself. If only CA weren't such an arrogant ass, I could just sneak over and make that happen whenever. I need this to escape my mind. Please. Please? I'm just going to drink some more wine, and then some more wine. I will listen to NIN and take some sleep meds, and fade the eff away. Can't waste any more thought on this. On the plus side, I woke up today not feeling sick anymore. 9:15 p.m. - 2014-10-15 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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