silver4's Diaryland Diary

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Changes

Every now and then I have to listen to the song "underneath it all" by NIN. I love the fragile album. I love them in concert.

It is my birthday this upcoming Saturday. 33. Bring it.

I told my friends that I will go ahead and get pregnant this year. Unlikely.

I hired a new person for front office today. I think I will hire a new one for the back as well. I have a former assistant from another office shadowing us right now, but I think she wants to work with us. It is a bit of a drive though, so I'm not sure if she is game. She comes back on Thursday, so I will offer her the position that day. I have so many changes I want for this office. I am going to make this place a fuckin success, dammit. I will expend all of my energy, as I have already been doing, and I will rock this. I live and breathe my office. I was told that I am not allowed to go in this weekend because of the whole birthday situation. My assistant said I should give her my key so I can't go in. She knows how I am. I hold on to a thought or a project and I must immerse myself in it. I have all faith and confidence that we will make this place amazing. So many ideas in my head, all the damn time. I wish I had more time to do everything, more money to afford everything.

And I wish I had someone to share my passion with. I mean, whatever, that is a complete aside. But fuck. It would be nice to share my passion with somebody who cares about me and supports me. My family and friends do. But you know what I mean. Somebody who shares my excitement and allows me to bounce my creativity off of him, let's me brainstorm and gives me constructive criticism. As for now, all I do is all me. My assistant shares my passion. But I ... I don't know.

Listening to the right side fragile album now. Because it makes sense to do so.

I am happy. I just want to come home after work or meet up with somebody and exclaim my joy and have someone to capture in my embrace and positivity... Such a waste of all of this love inside of me. It is fine. I am happy.

I just think NIN should go on tour again soon. Help me out a little. Maybe a concert with Tool. Satisfy this heart of mine.

I should sleep. Good night for now, dland

10:44 p.m. - 2015-01-19

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