silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Of late Some things are falling into place. Other things are stagnant. Nothing is a disaster, at least. Hung out with CA last weekend, he actually contacted me to hang out, which never happens. I won't read into it. Hooked up, had fun, went on about our days. As long as I don't hope for something that will never happen, I should be fine. I really do need to meet somebody new, because he is not good for me. If I hope for a future with anybody, I clearly need to stop with him. It's a silly cycle, I let him take advantage of my existence. He doesn't deserve the privilege, yet I continue to give it to him. Yeah. Zero intelligence. On the same note, I didn't work today, and I wasn't in the mood to do anything productive, so I decided to text JA and see what he was up to. He came over, so that's that... He just comes over and handles business, then leaves shortly thereafter. I could feel used, but I think I'm the one who used him this round. I just need to meet that nice guy who is ... nice to me. Wants to hang out with me. Doesn't have to be Prince Charming, just someone who is nice to me and likes me and wants to spend time with me. I realized, as I was kissing JA, how I have absolutely no emotions with anybody that I kiss anymore. How did it all become so impersonal? No passion. Somewhat sad. Oh well! Such is my life. I don't feel like saying anything else. I have more to say, but I am uninterested. Maybe I'll just go to sleep early. I have a class at 8 a.m. I just want to sleep, out of boredom. So be it. 7:56 p.m. - 2015-04-10 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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