silver4's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- fun. well not really. i'm taking a break from studying. or actually, i think i'm sort of always on a break from studying. i'm never really as focused as i would like to be. i was good today though; i went to the library around 10:30 or so this morning, and stayed there until around just after 4. then came home, cooked a little, and proceeded to study more. i got some stuff done. a lot of the test questions still make me laugh, because they are ridiculous and difficult. but whatever. it has to be done. i could've spent more time studying than i did, this is my fault. and actually, a few of the sections i'm not too bad at. i emailed one of the pedodontists at the school to see what his take is on whether or not i should try to apply right now. i would love to get in. i really don't know what i want to do otherwise. i vacillate between trying to join in with the military, or in some underserved area that does loan repayment assistance, or back to vegas and settle in some place i really wouldn't care to be, or stay out here and figure something out... whatever. i don't know. i wish these things were figured out. so caught a glance of MS in the library. we nodded and acknowledged one another, but that was it. i was trying to focus somewhat, but i was trying harder to stay awake. studying is boring. when i got home, H emailed me and said that he wants to visit me tomorrow. i sort of just like to hang out with him. we don't really get the chance to talk and hang out. whenever i see him at school, it's usually pretty transient. i went to school early yesterday to do some model work for my morning patient, and as i was rushing around mounting the models, he showed up in lab as well. as happy as i was to see him, i couldn't talk to him because i had to rush down to clinic to set up, which then turned into a ridiculous morning of things going one way, then another... it was hectic. too hectic. and then it carried into my lunch hour, not like that mattered, because i still had the untouched bagel i bought for breakfast in my bag, so i ate maybe half of that in between cleaning up and setting up for my next patient. and after i finished the next patient, got financial stuff situated, ran to grab a case from lab, and worked on notes, somewhere around 5:30 i was able to eat the other half. and then after more paperwork and computer work, somewhere around 6:30 i left with my roommate and convinced her to get pizza and beer with me. we talked a little about miscellaneous things, fortunately nothing regarding her ex-boyfriend. she doesn't know anything of any of the guys i deal with these days, except she has been in the living room when H or MS have stopped by. she has no idea of anything otherwise, and actually asked me if i had hooked up with someone i hadn't hooked up with. i thought she would ask me about M, but i guess that thought never crossed her mind. although i know other people in the school suspect it. anyways. i guess H will visit me then tomorrow. i emailed M and told him that i was pregnant in my dream last night. he asked me who pays for the abortion, him or H. i replied with a sad face and said i wanted to keep it. i have to study for a different test tomorrow for monday morning. bs. tired of this. multitasking on studying. and i have to review something to do a perio surgery monday afternoon. then i have to write a business plan after i finish the big test next weekend?? aaaaaagggghhhh. i don't have the energy for all of this. although i should be able to. okay okay.... M just texted me. he texts me all the time when he's with his other people. apparently he's at some kind of party and he says that everyone's wasted. yesterday throughout the day i had a headache, and when we got pizza i took a pill. then when i was home, i was still headachey and M was at his place texting me all night because his girl was out at some party so he was alone, and so he proceeds to talk to me, on and on and on. and i stayed in last night as well to study, and he knew that, yet he still just has to talk to me incessantly. it's funny but a little draining. blah. i need to go be productive again. 9:52 p.m. - 2009-12-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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